How I’m Dealing with Lent This Year

I was raised in a Protestant family. My dad is a minister (I’d say was, since he’s since retired, but it just sounds wrong to talk about your thriving parent in the past tense) but we were a pretty moderate family, religion-wise.

As a result, I’ve never really thought about Lent. Molly’s post, Sugar on My Tongue describes Lent as a challenge that helps her think about what she takes for granted in life, rather than an act of religious devotion.

I can respect that, and prefer that attitude to people who loudly proclaim what they’re giving up, just to seem godly. (You are not godly, you Pharisees.)

But since I’ve already given up tea, excessive sweets, excessive carbs, alcohol (not a huge loss, since I don’t really like it anyway), deli meats, pants that button, and comfortable sleeping positions for the duration of this pregnancy, I don’t really feel like giving up anything else.

So, just for fun, I’m going to completely misconstrue the idea of Lent this year, and give up a bunch of things that I don’t want anyway.

It’s sort of like when your kid sister comes up to you with the box of Good ‘n Plenty candies from her Halloween sack and says sweetly, “I want to share,” when you know good and well the little punk likes Snickers better anyway.

These are the things I am giving up for Lent.

1. Snow. I don’t want anymore. Stop storming immediately.
2. Negative feedback. Stop criticizing me. I get to be right for 40 days.
3. Keeping the aphids off my plants. Breed, you evil suckers, I’ll get you when the weather’s warm and I can spray you outside.
4. Carpal tunnel. I will now type for 20 hours straight without fear.
5. Empty cardboard food containers. When I am done with your contents, please disappear.
6. Accidental mouse clicks that delete my content and make me start over. I will give these up for life.
7. Burlap. It’s going to be difficult, but I will try to survive without it.

What is something that you would LIKE to give up for Lent? Or, if you have a lower tolerance for blasphemy and sacrilege and prefer to do things correctly, what is something that you actually are giving up for Lent?

Image credit: candy and pharisees