Experts Say He Was There for the Chicken Bakes.
This morning, Jon & I went to Costco to get new tires, bulk food & enough paper towels to build a small, super-absorbent plane.
Costco is not really a scary place, although sometimes I find their raw meat section intimidating, and once a crafty toddler tried to rip off my wallet at the picnic tables.
That being said, sometimes terrifying things are lurking beneath their shelves:
I get it that Halloween is coming. But when I’m searching for yogurt and a bag of fruit snacks, I don’t want to stumble upon a spider the size of a Smart Car.
Possibly, Costco is trying to push their seasonal merchandise by planting it in weird places throughout the store.
That would be funny, and I would buy 6 or 7 to support this campaign, and then plant them around the office. In high, dark corners of the supply closet. Or halfway hidden behind someone’s workstation, under their desk. Or, better still, stuffed into the credenza in the conference room.
What would you do with 7 gigantic spiders, access to anywhere, and enough time?
4 comments ↓
Hide them under the beds of children to further the development of their night terrors.
Good plan. Don’t forget to sneak back in and remove them before their parents can see it and understand their fears.
Also, no babysitting for Baby Kiah-Pork for YOU.
Oh my gosh Costco! I’d never been in one before I met Brian, who has a membership. In the beginning I found them extremely intimidating– the huge shopping carts, the high shelves, and the giant portions. It used to stress me out buying things in bulk, because it felt like a commitment (ok, so I am a commitment-phobe). I’d pick up an economy-sized jar of pickles and think, “I like pickles…but do I like TEN POUNDS OF PICKLES?” Now, of course, since I’ve discovered that Brian eats economy-sized portions of things, so they don’t last all that long, I am a big fan.
That’s just crazy talk. Who DOESN’T like 10 lbs of pickles?
Okay, well, maybe 10 lbs is a little too much. But 5 or 6? We’re all over that.
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